Childminders are professional childcarers who work in their own homes to provide care and education for other people's children in a family setting. They have to be registered and inspected by the Scottish Commission for the Regulation of Care.
Childminders can care for up to six children aged up to 16 at any one time, of whom no more than three are yet attending primary school and no more than one is under the age of one. This will include the childminder's own children and can be subject to personal circumstances.
Childminders can and will come across bullying behaviour among the children that they are responsible for in the same way as they will come across a variety of challenging behaviours.
Children may be experiencing or displaying bullying behaviours while in the childminders home or may disclose to the childminder the fact that they are being bullied elsewhere.
The checklist below is intended to provide guidance for, and increase confidence and competence in relation to, addressing bullying behaviour.
- Has the child disclosed that they are being bullied by another child in the childminder's care?
YES - Your first responsibility is to listen to the child and be respectful of the fact that they have chosen to talk to you. Try to talk with them in a quiet place, as free as possible from interruption. Allow them to tell you their concerns at their own pace. Be aware that it may be very difficult for them to tell you their concerns, particularly if one of the other children involved is your own child.
Reassure the child that they have done the right thing by coming to you, that you believe them and that you will make sure that the bullying will stop. Ask them what they want you to do. Ultimately, most children and young people who are experiencing bullying just want it to stop with as little fuss as possible. If they are concerned about retaliation then take this onboard and assure them that you will handle things sensitively.
NO - If the child has told you that they are being bullied by a child outwith your care, your initial response is still vital. Follow the advice above about listening well and reassuring them that they have done the right thing by telling and that you will help them.
Again, find out what they would like you to do. It is worth exploring who else they have told, if anyone. If they have not yet managed to tell their parents/carers or the school, then try to find out why. It is likely that they are worried about the response that they may get from the school or their parents. Try to find out more about these concerns and reassure them as far as possible that other adults will be supportive too.
In these circumstances, the child may tell you that they don't want you to tell anyone or do anything. Again, explore this further. Their concerns about you ‘doing something' are likely to be due to a fear of adults over-reacting. You have to decide what you should do with the information. This will depend on whether or not you think that the child is at risk of harm. It is best practice to tell a child/young person that you can't keep secrets about information they may give you that makes you worried for their safety. You can offer to tell the school or their parents on their behalf (if you were going to contact the school it is unlikely that you would be comfortable doing this without parental consent) or you can offer to be with them when they decide to tell another adult.
YES - Let the child/young person know that you believe them and that it sounds like they are right to be concerned. It is important that the child/young person feels involved in what will happen next. Your knowledge of the children involved will aid your decision about how to address the behaviour most effectively.
NO -You may believe that they are experiencing relationship difficulties rather than bullying behaviour. Undeveloped social skills and/or negotiation skills, as well as normal childhood behaviour, means that children will fall out with each other, argue and decide what is cool and what isn't. Learning how to overcome this and behave respectfully are skills that you can help children develop.
If this is the case then it's important that you convey this to them. It's important that children and young people can appropriately define bullying behaviour as well as adults. You might want to consider reiterating the values of your household. It can be difficult, but not impossible, for children to learn that behaviour which may be accepted in some environments is not accepted in all. Deal with this in the same way you would deal with any challenging behaviour displayed by children in your care, including your decision to inform/involve parents.
- Are you confident in using strategies to address the bullying behaviour?
YES - Be aware that you may have to have a number of strategies at your disposal depending on the age of the child involved. It is also important to bear in mind the fact that you may have to use a number of strategies in order to effectively end the bullying behaviour. One size does not fit all.
NO - respectme would always advocate speaking to the child/young person involved in a way that allows you to point out that the behaviour is bullying behaviour. This is regardless of whether or not their intent was to ‘bully'. Naming bullying behaviour does not automatically mean that you are labelling a child/young person a ‘bully' for life. As adults, if someone wants us to change a behaviour or practice then we expect to be told what the negative or inappropriate behaviour is in order to change it. We believe that the same applies to children. If you name the behaviour as bullying then be prepared for a reaction and use the reaction. No-one likes to be called a bully and the child you are talking to is likely to be upset at this statement.
Build upon this. Ask them why they are upset and what they find so offensive about their behaviour being called bullying. Children/young people need to understand that regardless of intention, if the recipient of their behaviour is feeling frightened, anxious and low, then the impact means that it is bullying.
As always, it's important to speak to the child using words that they will understand. Explain that what they are doing is unacceptable and that it has to stop - they must understand what the consequences of their behaviour are likely to be. It might be that other children won't want to play with them or it may be tangible sanctions that you have in place (time out, removal of a toy for a set period of time, informing behaviour etc). With all challenging behaviour, including bullying behaviour, consistency is the key to success.
If you have many children from one school cluster within your care then it can be helpful to approach the school and ask to speak with them about the strategies that they employ to address bullying behaviour in order to mirror them within your home. This can be very effective in reinforcing what behaviour is unacceptable. The school may also have valuable information on any behaviour that they are seeing displayed by the child in the school, although you would need parental consent to speak to the school directly about an individual child. When developing any relationship with the school, and in particular, when wishing to obtain permission to discuss a particular child, always be positive with their parent. Explain that you don't want to confuse the child but to reinforce the positive messages they are receiving from the school and from their own home. This reinforcement is likely to have a more successful outcome for the child.
- The childcare routine and setting should be reviewed in order to identify any factors which may allow or encourage bullying.
If bullying behaviour is observed, reported or disclosed within the childcare setting then it is worth considering whether there is anything within your control that could be altered. Your response and strategies in addressing bullying behaviour are only part of a bigger picture. Overall, the setting should foster an ethos of caring, respect and honesty where prejudices and bullying behaviour are not tolerated and difference is celebrated.
This ethos should be reinforced through everyday activities. Children should be encouraged to speak respectfully to each other and to you. Diversity and difference should be celebrated and not watered down or ignored. Children should be encouraged to play together but more importantly, to be considerate and respectful when they don't want to play together. Exclusion and isolation should not be tolerated.
Consider how you will communicate this ethos to parents. You don't have to wait for something to happen to remind parents that the ethos of the childcare setting is important and that you have certain expectations of behaviour. Do the parents and the children know what you consider to be unacceptable behaviour? Do they know what will happen when bullying behaviour or other challenging behaviour occurs?
Finally, as you are likely to have a long-term caring commitment for the child who is experiencing bullying, it's important to remember that to limit the potential long-term impacts of bullying there must be support structures in place, even when the bullying has ceased. This should involve support from yourself, parents and, where applicable, the school or nursery. This will reduce the impacts on their self-confidence, esteem, communication and social skills.
It will also be in the best interests of the child who is displaying bullying behaviour for you to work alongside the parents and other adults to identify the reasons behind the bullying behaviour. All behaviour is communication and this is also true among young children. There may be something in their life that's causing them to feel anxious, stressed or scared, e.g. a house move, a divorce, a new sibling, changing school or bereavement.
Click here to access information on the free respectme anti-bullying training dates across Scotland. respectme can also offer further advice on anti-bullying policies and practices to individuals and organisations as well as practical advice on specific issues or concerns.
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